Although it is a taboo subject, fantasizing about another person while having sex with your partner is common. But is it positive? According to sexologists, they revealed how healthy this habit is and what it says about your relationship.
Fantasy with another person is normal?
“As sexed beings, we will be attracted to countless people throughout our lives. Therefore, it can really happen that a certain person increases our level of desire. This is quite common and there is no problem, “says Brazilian sexologist Jussania Oliveira
“There is no indicator of how healthy it is or not to imagine another person during sex. Therefore, it depends on how each couple relates. Sometimes it’s something agreed between the two, says Priscila Junqueira, a Master of Science and a specialist in Sexology. “Being attracted to people, even within a monogamous relationship, is something natural,” they says.
Specialists say that it can be a good way to keep the flame alive in the couple and break with the routine.
Oliveira remembers that it is important that couples create an opening to talk about their sexual fantasies , since there is still much repression around the issue, even in the most intimate couples.
“It’s not about telling your partner that you’re thinking about someone else, but about detecting what eroticizes you about what you’re imagining and trying to corporate it into sex with your partner,” he advises.
Can it hurt the relationship?
On the other hand, the sexologist maintains that, when it is constant, the practice can be a symptom of problems in the relationship.
“I think the warning signal is seen when sex with your partner only happens if the other figure is in your imagination at that moment,” says Oliveira. “Then, it becomes necessary to know oneself and ask what is happening in that relationship, because clearly there is no more desire”, explains the specialist
She emphasizes that it is essential to periodically maintain the sexual life of the couple: “It is very important to invest in sexuality, with new situations, fantasies, places, trips, erotic products and so on. Each couple must find their own way to reinvent themselves, “they recommends.
“Longer relationships tend to be solid in issues such as affection, companionship and friendship, but they must also pay special attention to sexual activity,” recalls the expert.